Wondering....again

In the midst of all the wondering why's recently, when I really felt like I was just going to collapse from all the stress and anxiety related to LM's illness, my flu, and Dad's fragility, this photo arrived in my e-mail. How could I wonder, I asked myself, just believe, believe that everything is happening as it is supposed to...LM's heart seizure was a gift to "us", as now he will be alive a lot longer to continue doing all he loves, and things long postponed, with renewed dedication. We now have greater clarity and depth just as that reflected in the rainbow as it lit up the garden of my friend, Judy in North Carolina last week. Judy and her partner, Anne, live in the beautiful mountains of the Asheville, NC area. I am ever so grateful that they shared this very meaningful and lovely photo with us and feel it was part of the plan which has brought me peace and acceptance for where we are right now.

Today was another good day. LM got his new mattress and he is so hoping it will help in his battle with insomnia and discomfort. He continues to have some coughing and swallowing issues, but has been in contact with his dr. and is being watched. I will see him tomorrow after I visit my Dad. I dread seeing Dad in his diminished state. I have not seen him for 5 weeks due to all that has been happening here. In another of life's little miracles, my dear daughter-in-law, Alison, contacted me this morning and asked if she could go with me tomorrow, not wanting me to be alone, and I have gratefully told her I would love to share the day with her. She is the director of an assisted living program, a dedicated administrator specializing in the care of Alzheimer's patients, and will be able to cast her professional eye on Dad's condition, as well. She is a dear friend to me and I am sure it will be a nice day.