Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Alien Moods

Having read lots about grief, I know it can take many forms. In order to let it wash over me, I am just treating myself gently and having frequent moments when I am filled with tears, memories and conflict. More often than not, I am in a stony stare. It is painful that this loss brings me back to other losses and they seem to be forming a ball of pain in my heart.
LM is feeling a lot of the same and we sort of check in with each other to talk it out.....he less able to be forthcoming about his sadness, although it is very evident. He has so much to do related to the estate.
There is no way of knowing how long this will take....how we will deal with the memorial service and burial on 2/28, but I do know we will be close to each other and get through it somehow. It is complicated by the fact LM has inherited Bob's estate.

Meanwhile, it was a beautiful day with everything covered by a thick blanket of snow. As long as I can see the beauty, I know I am OK.
To shore me up a bit, I have tightened up my healthy eating and making sure I exercise each day, as that always seems to keep my emotions on a more even keel.

Once again, I want to say to all my readers how very grateful I am for all the loving support. Each little "hug" and warm regard is so meaningful. What wonderful friends!


Julie said...

Get a little walk in each day. I find moving really refreshes my soul.
It is great that you two have each other; even if it is sitting in silence, the bond is there.
Best of luck to you over the next few weeks.


amy in ct said...

this is a tough time for you both
and having to deal with the 'paperwork' part of it too does not help any.
i know when my dad died and when my sons dad died, it took me quite a while to be normal again. the feelings you are going thru are normal and it is wonderful that you have each other
take care of yourselves